Reflection

So this week as a result of a fitness thing I'm doing I'm supposed to be working on my stress reduction through meditation, personal reflection, or relaxation techniques.  Today I decided I would focus on a little reflection.
Firstly motherhood.  I think hugs from my baby maybe one of the best things about my day.  I like attack hugs where little one tackles me for hugs.  I like hugs that I have to work to get.  I often tell little one that I want a hug to which I am give a sly look and she turns to run like heck so mom has to catch her.  I'm not sure that I'll ever feel like I get the balance between work and home right (maybe if I can be healthy, which wasn't the case as of late).  However, I think that's okay.  When I'm at home playing, I don't let work hound me.  I am more efficient at using my time at work.  I feel guilt when I have to work late, but working late is not a regular occurrence. 
Secondly work.  I am happy with my work.  I'm not settling for just teaching what I have always taught how I've always taught it.  I'm expanding my knowledge base.  I am coming to the conclusion that I'd like to have a "teaching philosophy" group.  In a perfect, world I'd like to talk to people about what works for them in a classroom, how they strive to improve themselves, and that kind of thing.  I don't want it to be a "let's bitch about students" thing.  For now, I'm going to continue my reading for my own expansion and then I think I'm going to look into the teaching group thing.  It could crash and burn, but I think with the right group of people it could be really interesting.
Thirdly balance.  I am always in need of finding the right balance for me.  The balance between me time, family time, and work.  I think this is such an issue for me because I don't want to take away from family or work to just have me time.  I know it shouldn't be less of a priority, but it is.  I'm not sure how to change that.  I need to find something that it is just to me that I need to leave my house for.  Maybe I just need to work harder to reestablish a "girl's night."  I don't know.  I need to think harder about what would make me truly happy and what I wouldn't just end up feeling guilty about.  I'm glad that I am finally over the sickness (even if I'm not healed enough to go to spin) so that I can work out again.  Working out is such an equalizer to me.
Okay that's what I've got for now.  I'm going to clean up toys and grade tests while eating ice cream now.